Couples psychologist Peter Pearson told Tech Insider that the best way for singletons to figure out what they want is to "date as much as they can manage or tolerate." Why?Because you can't actually figure out what works for you (and what doesn't) until you meet people with a variety of traits and see what it's like to hang with them.It turns out that people that are insecure but romantically successful manage to channel their nervous tics into behaviors that are linked with other, more attractive qualities.A nervous talker can come across as a brilliant conversationalist, and eagerness to please is easily interpreted as niceness.What can you absolutely not stand — nail-biting, sarcasm, chronic lateness?
It makes sense: Alcohol, as most of us know, lowers inhibitions.You'll talk a little more, laugh a little more, and ease up on the awkwardness.It's also not a huge investment in terms of time or money.Both genders reported a better connection when the woman was the focus of the conversation, and the men showed "alignment and understanding." This study has some pretty hefty limitations: All 1,000 dates were between opposite-sex pairs of Standford graduate students.But it's still probably fair to say that if you're hoping to hear that The Queen Mary study also recommends using what they call the " rule" in your online profile to get more matches: That is, devote 70% of your profile to who you are, and 30% to what you're looking for in a partner.There's a flip side to this strategy: Once you figure out what works, what do you need to do to attract someone with those characteristics? No, what we're saying here has a lot to do with point #1: You want a fun person that likes fun?